Mental health

Avoidant/Anxious Dynamic :
The most painful dating pattern nobody talks about:
The anxious person craves closeness. The avoidant person fears it. So they find each other perfectly, magnetically.
The anxious chases. The avoidant pulls back. The anxious tries harder. The avoidant feels suffocated.
Neither is villian. Both are wounded.
Most "incompatible" couples aren't incompatible they're just two unhealed people triggering each other's oldest fears.

What’s everyone’s thoughts on trusting your gut for fearful avoidant people. Like whenever you’re in the talking stage with someone and you suddenly get uncomfortable even moving forward, and then you make up reasons for why it wouldn’t work out, despite the person being actually really great. And then you don’t know if it’s a gut feeling that you should trust or you just being fearful avoidant. Obviously istikharah is the best move but it’s still confusing sometimes.

It definetly takes active effort into not running away when things get serious, but it’s like a physical nervous system reaction, you even may get the ick.

Anyone else experience this?

Everyone's moving. You're standing still. 🌊
But the sea isn't dead when it's calm —
it's resting.
Your stagnant season isn't punishment.
It's protection you haven't recognized yet.
Look around. Count what's still standing.
Count who's still here.
Then whisper...
Alhamdulillah. 🤲

Something that have struck me in my 20s..

We can never “live” or “experience” someone else’s emotions. Whenever anyone say “ I know how you feel”, in reality, nope we don’t. Sadness does not feel the same in any 2 lives.

Fair doesn’t mean equal, does it ?

I Don't know who needs to hear this, but one year ago I hit my lowest point. I was frustrated, angry, and sad when life didn't turn out as I expected it to be . I avoided talking to people.

I continued my prayers even when I didn't feel like it, even when I knew my focus was not there.

Then there came a point where I accepted that if this is what Allah has written for me, I will accept it. I let go of the need to achieve things faster. I slowly looked inward and asked myself what I truly want and how I can achieve it. Then I started working towards those things.

On the outside, only a little has changed, but as a person I have been at peace. I still want a wife, kids, and a family, but only in the way Islam guides us.

My advice:
Accept your life as it is right now, even if it's difficult. Then be grateful for everything you have. Create a plan for what you want and work towards it consistently. Focus on what you want, not on what you don't have.

And if things don't go as planned, remember, this life is a test, and every effort you make sincerely for the sake of Allah will never go unrewarded. Trust His plan, even when you can't see it.

What food would you recommend to someone who wants to visit your country ?

Bismillah

A person chosen by Allah will never be chosen by humans.

When Allah sets you apart,
He's not rejecting you from the world.
He's redirecting you towards Him.

Sometimes rejection isn't a sign that you're unworthy, it's a sign that you've been chosen for a higher path.

When Allah loves someone, He detaches them from the world to attach them to Himself.
That's not loneliness.
That's Allah's protection.

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barahkatuh 😊