Fun & Laughs

The most dangerous phrase on Muzz:
"You seem different from the rest."
Brother. Sister.
We are ALL the same.
Tired. Hopeful. Slightly delusional. Refreshing the app every 20 minutes.
Nobody is different.
We are all just really good at pretending during the first week. 😭💀

Muzz really has you out here doing this:
Open app. See notifications. Get excited.
It's a like from someone with no photo. 😭
Check anyway.
Bio says "serious only."
Profile empty since 2022.
Close app.
Reopen app 4 minutes later.
Ya Allah give me strength AND a spouse. Both. Now. 🤲😂

Me before joining Muzz vs after:
Before:
"I want someone deep, spiritual, emotionally intelligent, ambitious, kind, funny, and genuine." 🌟
After 2 weeks:
"Bro just reply. That's it. Just reply." 😭
Standards didn't lower.
Expectations just became more... realistic. 💀

Dating app stages of grief:
Denial: This app will work. I just need the right bio.
Anger: WHY DID THEY READ IT AND NOT REPLY. 😭
Bargaining: Ya Allah if you send me one good match I will pray all my sunnah forever. 🤲
Depression: stares at 0 new messages at 2am
Acceptance: Maybe I'll just marry whoever my mom suggests. She was right all along. 😂

I love listening to people’s problems. It helps me forget my own.

according to people’s profiles I’m SO SHORT!!!

I’ve had a crush on this guy for six months. He’s in my favourites and I keep opening muzz just to see if he's retired from the app 😩

She is asking Arab mom for her son's hand in marriage.
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DVB54OskXif/?igsh=dG50aGE5YWM0bHdp

A husband and wife stopped talking to each other… 🥺

One day later, the wife said:

“I’m going to count to 10. If you don’t speak before then, I’ll drink poison!” 🥲😱

One… 😔 Husband silent.
Two… 😔 Husband silent.
Three… 😔 Husband silent.
Four… 😌 Husband silent.
Five… 😌 Husband silent.
Six… 😞 Husband silent.
Seven… 😌 Husband silent.
Eight… 🤫 Husband silent.

When the wife reached nine, she started crying.

Husband: “Keep counting, keep counting!” 🥲

Wife: “Thank God, at least you finally spoke!” 😂

And thus, the life of a great woman was saved. 😅🤭🤣💖