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All things marriage

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Marriage is half our Deen 🤲 From wedding planning to relationship and marriage advice, share all your marriage related experiences here with our friendly community ❤️

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Nabeel Ahmad

@Nabeel19732415

about 1 hour ago

Hi someone is here?

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Doctor

@drahmer370544

about 1 hour ago

What's one quality you value most in a spouse?

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Jarrar

@jarriabq

about 1 hour ago

Hey AssalamAlikum Everyone,

What’s up…

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Maaz Khan

@MaazKhan23974192

about 1 hour ago

Hi everyone my Name is maaz I want good and cute girl which honestly

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Anonymous

about 1 hour ago

Do people still believe that if you don’t bleed on the first night that the girl isn’t a virgin? Or have we evolved enough to realise not every woman’s hymen breaks? Or even has one?

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almoraisi

@Almoraisi

about 1 hour ago

what do u think
love come after married or before

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Rufiq

@RUFIQH

about 1 hour ago

TRIGGER WARNING: What goes through the mind of a Muslim man embarking on polygamy.

The decision is made firstly based on the ability on:-

  1. Justice & Fair treatment for all
  2. Financial capabilities from halal means where the husband is the sole provider
  3. Physical ability including time & intimacy
  4. Mental capacity to lead 2 Family, especially women

However, there are only a handful of men who will meet those qualifiers, but what trumps all the above qualifications is the single most critical 5th test that they need to pass is that:-

  1. “They don’t fear their wife, but only fear Allah”

Only a select men from the 4 qualifiers can do this, that’s why a man who is ready to do polygamy the correct Sunnah way is extremely rare. Because, they need to be ready for their 1st wife to potentially do kufr and lose everything from access to children to their assets from the kuffar law (please don’t make excuse by quoting following the law of the land).

I totally understand why women hate polygamy and I’m not blaming majority of Muslimah’s for doing so, and I also understand the strategy of sisterhood to shame a man for embarking on polygamy so that they can warn their husbands of the consequences.

When this subject is discussed, most women seem to lose their logical intellect and argue from emotional space I.e how could you hurt me or break our family? The point they miss is that it’s the husbands right that he is exercising irrespective of how you feel and he is not breaking the family, he is adding to the family unless the women decides to break the family for something he is doing in a halal way.

From a man’s perspective, he doesn’t arrive at this decision on lust, but to maximise his good deeds from more righteous children and also give the Muslimah a halal option away from Zina.

The man needs to be ready from all kufr actions. So if his wife blocks the children and severes the ties of kinship, then he has to be ready for that and compensate by having more children with the 2nd wife. Or if she takes half his assets from kufr court then he has to be patient and wait for compensation on the day of judgement.

What I’ve noticed from my search is that Muslimah’s are ok to be 2nd wife irrespective of what they put on their profile (not open to polygamy) and it seems they openly talk about shunning polygamy but privately they see this as a viable option. Maybe someone can explain why what they say openly is different to what they will accept?

Another aspect that is not widely discussed is that vilification of the 2nd wife, where the community will call her family breaker, when all she is only following halal option instead of Zina, where is the sisterhood in helping a Muslimah exercise halal option?

I have a lot of female relatives in my family and I would not object if they wanted to be in a polygamous relationship. However, I think we all know that women will only agree to such relationship if the Man is worthy enough.

I am well versed on the Fiqh or polygamy and the Western world so I’m not asking for advice and my 1st is aware so nothing is hidden, but I am just sincerely brain dumping from someone who is embarking on this journey before I get off this app, as I’ve seen some Muslimah asking why men embark on this. I still love my first wife and children and will fulfill my Islamic duties irrespective of what she does and there’s nothing anyone can say or do to stop me from this path (3 potentials already), and I don’t see myself above any man for doing this as only Allah knows which of his servant is closest to him.

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Hassan Khan

@Mohsin33730210

about 1 hour ago

Hii anyone Guide what is Jamaa..?

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Муди

@driv3r

about 1 hour ago

Judge me if you want but if we get married you're following my diet, no processed food, no fast and junk food, no cigarettes, and you're not going to work idc even if you make 7 figures, you're staying home.

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