A Message to the Brothers (and Sisters)

Assalamu Alaikum everyone,
I am writing this because I feel a deep sense of disappointment and anger regarding the vulgar language and insulting words that were recently directed toward women in this space. As a man, and more importantly as a Muslim, I cannot sit by and stay silent after witnessing that.

To the sisters who had to see and endure that behavior: I am truly, deeply sorry. You deserve spaces where you feel safe, respected, and valued, not subjected to locker-room talk, disrespect, or vulgarity.

As Muslim men, we like to talk a lot about our role as protectors, but protection isn't just about physical safety; it’s about protecting the dignity and honor of our sisters in Islam. We as a collective need to do so much better. If we are online acting with no haya (modesty) and treating women like objects or targets for insults, then we are failing in our duties.
Allah reminds us in the Quran of the mutual responsibility we have toward one another.

"The believers, men and women, are allies of one another. They enjoin what is right and forbid what is wrong..."
— Surah At-Tawbah (9:71)

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) made it incredibly clear how a true believer speaks and acts. He explicitly warned us against the exact type of language that was used here:

The believer is not one who slanders, curses, or uses obscene or vulgar language."
— Jami` at-Tirmidhi

And in his final sermon, among his last reminders to the Ummah, he didn't tell men to dominate women; he commanded us: "Fear Allah regarding women, for you have taken them by the oath of Allah."

We need to hold ourselves to a higher standard. True masculinity in Islam is defined by character, restraint, and manners, not by who can speak the crudest insults in a chat room. If you see a brother do this, check him and remind him of his duty as a Muslim protector of this deen and those within it. The sisters are the future nurturers of the next generation. If we don’t treat them well how will we answer to Allah on that day. Fear Allah brothers , for oppressing or dishonouring a muslimah can lead to Jahannam where apologies and tears will do you no good.